0 Parenting Toddlers- The 8 tips I use to keep me sane when dealing with temper tanrums!

Two years old...Oh this is the age when toddlers lose their mind. I'm sure every mother of a toddler can relate to the crying are you really going to cry because you can't pour juice all over the table!? and temper tantrums. I am now the mother of a two year old and I am barely making it day by day but, each day I learn how to better handle the all the crying, whining, and temper tantrums! Would I call this parenting advice? Not hardly! This is my survival guide that I'm sharing with you, feel free to add any tips in the comment section; we are in this together!

How I'm surviving, the terrible two's....

1. I spend time ALONE to THINK and RECOVER. Every night or morning I spend time alone to think and get my mind together. I simply think about the day and figure out how things can be better tomorrow. This is a must. 
2. Go outside. I could spend days indoors and never step foot outside when I am really busy but, toddlers...oh they need outside. My daughter is so much more pleasant to be around when she has had time to run around in the fresh air and sunshine When it's cold, we go on car rides. Just let the child out...
3. Get off the computer. Even when I have work to do on the computer, some days I have to just wait until naptime or bedtime. There is really no way to get around this at times, two year olds hate to not be the center of attention. They need to feel included. If you MUST work, get them a desk (big chair and tray table) and let them "work" alongside you.
4. Call them back. I find that my daughter acts her absolute worse when I'm trying to hold an important conversation on the phone about how to fry chicken or how I'm going to fix my hair...What!? That's what friends are for... I have learned to save long phone conversations until night or naptime. Unless, you want your toddler to yell and scream while you're on the phone. I don't.
5. Remain calm. We all can get a little unhinged after dealing with 456 temper meltdowns, when you reach number 457, remain calm. I find that when I'm calm, my daughter is calm. Yeah, she may still be upset but, it cuts the temper tantrums in half.  I have learned how to be calm yet, stern. "We aren't going to eat pie right now but, we can color. Okay? Let's go color a pretty picture for daddy!"
6. Hide it or throw it away. At the end of the day when I'm thinking about all the things I could improve on, I try to figure out what caused some of the meltdowns (not mine, the toddler's). If the tantrum was because she couldn't play with my phone, I try to remember to keep it out of her sight when I'm not using it. I used to be all, well she has to learn no is no and whatever...haha! Now, I just move whatever it is and move on to something else. Thankfully, toddlers have the memory of a goldfish and are easily distracted. 
7. Ask questions. When my loving sweet daughter gets to whining and crying, I use a trick I learned from a friend; just ask what's wrong. "Did you hurt yourself?" "What's wrong?" "Are you hungry?" "Why are you crying?" "Want a hug?" "Do you need a nap?" (sometimes she will say yes to this!) Asking questions makes them stop crying and think, toddlers can't cry and think. 
8. Pick your battles, wisely. Is it really going to hurt her to wear her purple shoes with her black dress? Not really, so just say okay and move on. Some things are just not worth the fight. Thanks to my husband, I have been left feeling stupid plenty of times when he has asked "Well, why can't she have it?" and all I have is "Because I said so!!". Really? Really?! Just give the child another grape or cookie and move on with life. 3 cookies instead of 2 is going to hurt who? No one.
9. What are you tips? What have you learned?

I by no means, advocate giving a child everything they want but, I have learned that some things are just not that serious. 

Hope this helps you!!

Also, check out The Peaceful Solution Character Education Program they have a Parenting Manual that I use and love! Helps keep me sane!




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0 Ants in my pants... being a SAHM

Currently, I am a SAHM (stay at home mommy) and I just can't seem to rest until I change that to WAHM (work at home mommy). For the first few years of my marriage I was a SAHW-wife but, I was always trying to find some business to start. I have always been this way, I think. I hated school once I hit high school, I never wanted to go to college, I hate 9-5 schedules but, I love working.

I love creating and crafting. I love making things with my hands (maybe it's a left handed thing?) and right now, me sitting at home with no business is killing me softly. I love to draw, make jewelry, mix up stuff and do computer stuff.Yeah, I like to do....stuff.

If I could build a huge business I would be a haircare/skincare, soap, jewelry, accessory making business woman!

I find that I have the most joy when I am knee deep in some type of hobby. I have so much craft supplies, it's crazy! My friends are always shocked when I tell them I know about making this or that.

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I know this post is kind of all over the place. I'm trying to convince myself to get back into building a business and I'm also trying to tell myself to chill out. I'm giving myself 4 months to research and get my plan together before I jump into anything.

Ugh...I feel like I will either sink or swim and I am too nervous to even try to swim...

0 Your child is not my child...when we as parents cross the line

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Sure, I may not feed my child Frosted Flakes for breakfast but, I don't have the right to tell another mother not too. That's not my child.

As mothers, we can get very passionate about the decisions we have made for our families. Knowing that we have chosen these things because we see them as beneficial, we feel like everyone should choose them too. The truth is, they don't have too. No one has to do what we do and we have to accept that.

I had to accept this fact as well. For example, I breastfed my daughter, I saw so many pros to breastfeeding and I never thought anyone would disagree with the decision. I figured all mothers should breastfeed their children. Breast is best and people who didn't were usually ill-informed or lazy. (I know right...) I learned things are not so black and white. Yes, I still believe breast is best and breast milk trumps formula but, I have also learned that every mother has a right to choose what she wants to feed her baby. I chose what was best for me and my child and I would hate for someone else to tell me otherwise or try and take that right away from me.

We live and we learn.

I have learned that when I focus on my own family and doing what is best for us, I am not concerned with sticking my nose where it doesn't belong. Some things are just none of my business. I'm not the parent of anyone else child except my own and I will be held accountable for her and her only. Realizing this, felt so freeing. I felt a peace come over me, seriously. I'm no longer looking for a debate. I don't care. As long as they aren't breaking the law of the land, there isn't much I can do.

It's about respect. We, as parents have to respect what other people choose to do with their children. No, I may not like the choices they make but, I do need to respect them and act accordingly.  In doing this, I am teaching my daughter as well. I am teaching her that we may not like everything we see and hear but, that doesn't give us the right to put others down or belittle them. We have to be concerned with ourselves and what's going on in our own backyard.

I was kind of sad when I saw women (mothers) confessing to spending too much time on the computer debating and actually neglecting their children because of it. I had to look at myself, I didn't want that to be me. I only have one opportunity to raise my child right. I will never get this opportunity again, and neither will you.